


The Dinner Party

by Nocticola



Category: Doubt (TV)
Genre: 1x11 I'm In If You Are, Canon Trans Character, F/M, They're cute, i liked a lot of the dialogue in this episode so the a/n is really long, post episode 1x11 I'm In If You Are, the fic is short but i wanted to write something about them
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-25
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2019-04-27 22:52:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14435871
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nocticola/pseuds/Nocticola
Summary: Previously on Doubt 11. I'm in If You Are:CAMERON: Peter, I --PETER: Just hear me out, please. This is nothing you don't already know, but there are certain things that you just don't do as a straight guy. Someone sees you crying when you're a little kid, they laugh at you, tell you boys don't cry. That list of rules gets longer the older you get. Don't wear pink. Don't cook, unless you're grilling meat. And definitely don't date a trans woman. Somehow, doing those things makes you gay.CAMERON: Peter, seriously, talk to your therapist.PETER: I did. Been talking to her once a week since we started dating, but I just I just need to say this out loud. If I were gay, I would dive in head first and be awesome at it. But I'm not gay.CAMERON: Oh, my God, can we not do this?PETER: Cam, you have had a long time to think about trans stuff. Can you just give me a quick "who am I" moment?CAMERON: Okay, fine.PETER: Thank you. Somehow, dating a trans woman is supposed to make you less of a man. But that doesn't make sense, because when I'm with you, I feel like more of a man. More myself. Better. It wasn't really adding up for me, and I've never had to question any of those rules about being a man before. I mean, first thing I did when I got to New York was drag a grill out on my fire escape.CAMERON: You love that grill.PETER: Yeah. Cam, when it was just the two of us, I could, I could push all of those questions aside. But when I thought about the people in that courtroom Judge, the court officer, the stenographer I knew exactly what they would think if we told them we were dating. Because six months ago, I would have thought the same cruel things. That there is something wrong with me. Some failure of masculinity. And I run a courtroom. The idea of being judged and found lacking there, of all places I couldn't get out of bed.CAMERON: So you called in sick and didn't text me.PETER: Because I was ashamed. I was being a coward. Cam, I know I shouldn't care about what some stenographer thinks about me, but you can't just, one day, decide to throw out all of those things that have been hardwired into you since recess. I freaked out. Then you came over to my place and you kicked my ass. And I realized that I was gonna have to either learn to live without those rules, or learn to live without you. Turns out, none of this is actually complicated. At all. If you'll have me, I want to side with you. No matter what. No matter where, and no matter who. There's a victim's rights fundraiser tonight. Most of my office is gonna be there. Be my date. Meet my people.CAMERON: No.PETER: Uh, just just no?CAMERON: The thought of telling people we're dating was so bad, you couldn't get out of bed, Peter? That doesn't make me feel great. And we could have talked about that the night before you called in sick, or that morning, but you disappeared. I'm just supposed to trust that that won't happen again? No.----CAMERON: Sadie says I'm an idiot.PETER: (sighs) I'm the idiot.CAMERON: I was still mad. I had my guard up. [Cam-] I have to admit, as far as "I messed up" speeches go, yours was pretty darn good.PETER: Well I meant every word.CAMERON: I know. And that's why if the offer still stands, I'd love to be your plus one to this stupid thing tonight.PETER: The offer still stands.CAMERON: So if either of us starts to feel uncomfortable for any reason, we can use the code wordPETER: "Teacup pig." You know, before we walk into the lions' den, I, uh, actually have some pretty big news.CAMERON: Is it an excuse not to go?PETER: You wish. (Laughs) No. With all these things coming out about Russo and the Brennan trial, she's under pressure to resign. Wait, it gets better. Word around the office is they're tapping someone in this car for acting D.A. Already started the vetting process.CAMERON: Oh, my God, Peter, amazing.PETER: Yeah.CAMERON: Congratulations.[kisses Peter’s cheek](chuckles softly) Although that means any hope of this being a low-key, meet-the-colleagues type of event just evaporated. Tonight just became a way bigger deal.PETER: People congratulating me, buying us drinks, getting wasted and asking inappropriate questions to the woman on the arm of the man of the hour.CAMERON: Should we postpone? Do the big introductions literally any other night?PETER: We could. But I was serious before. I mean, if you are.CAMERON: Even if the headline tomorrow around the watercooler isn't "Cute A.D.A. becomes acting D.A." Now it's "Acting D.A. has transgender girlfriend"?PETER: Yeah.CAMERON: Okay. I'm in.





	The Dinner Party

**Author's Note:**

> Previously on Doubt 11. I'm in If You Are:
> 
> CAMERON: Peter, I --  
> PETER: Just hear me out, please. This is nothing you don't already know, but there are certain things that you just don't do as a straight guy. Someone sees you crying when you're a little kid, they laugh at you, tell you boys don't cry. That list of rules gets longer the older you get. Don't wear pink. Don't cook, unless you're grilling meat. And definitely don't date a trans woman. Somehow, doing those things makes you gay.  
> CAMERON: Peter, seriously, talk to your therapist.  
> PETER: I did. Been talking to her once a week since we started dating, but I just I just need to say this out loud. If I were gay, I would dive in head first and be awesome at it. But I'm not gay.  
> CAMERON: Oh, my God, can we not do this?  
> PETER: Cam, you have had a long time to think about trans stuff. Can you just give me a quick "who am I" moment?  
> CAMERON: Okay, fine.  
> PETER: Thank you. Somehow, dating a trans woman is supposed to make you less of a man. But that doesn't make sense, because when I'm with you, I feel like more of a man. More myself. Better. It wasn't really adding up for me, and I've never had to question any of those rules about being a man before. I mean, first thing I did when I got to New York was drag a grill out on my fire escape.  
> CAMERON: You love that grill.  
> PETER: Yeah. Cam, when it was just the two of us, I could, I could push all of those questions aside. But when I thought about the people in that courtroom Judge, the court officer, the stenographer I knew exactly what they would think if we told them we were dating. Because six months ago, I would have thought the same cruel things. That there is something wrong with me. Some failure of masculinity. And I run a courtroom. The idea of being judged and found lacking there, of all places I couldn't get out of bed.  
> CAMERON: So you called in sick and didn't text me.  
> PETER: Because I was ashamed. I was being a coward. Cam, I know I shouldn't care about what some stenographer thinks about me, but you can't just, one day, decide to throw out all of those things that have been hardwired into you since recess. I freaked out. Then you came over to my place and you kicked my ass. And I realized that I was gonna have to either learn to live without those rules, or learn to live without you. Turns out, none of this is actually complicated. At all. If you'll have me, I want to side with you. No matter what. No matter where, and no matter who. There's a victim's rights fundraiser tonight. Most of my office is gonna be there. Be my date. Meet my people.  
> CAMERON: No.  
> PETER: Uh, just just no?  
> CAMERON: The thought of telling people we're dating was so bad, you couldn't get out of bed, Peter? That doesn't make me feel great. And we could have talked about that the night before you called in sick, or that morning, but you disappeared. I'm just supposed to trust that that won't happen again? No.  
> \----  
> CAMERON: Sadie says I'm an idiot.  
> PETER: (sighs) I'm the idiot.  
> CAMERON: I was still mad. I had my guard up. [Cam-] I have to admit, as far as "I messed up" speeches go, yours was pretty darn good.  
> PETER: Well I meant every word.  
> CAMERON: I know. And that's why if the offer still stands, I'd love to be your plus one to this stupid thing tonight.  
> PETER: The offer still stands.
> 
>  
> 
> CAMERON: So if either of us starts to feel uncomfortable for any reason, we can use the code word  
> PETER: "Teacup pig." You know, before we walk into the lions' den, I, uh, actually have some pretty big news.  
> CAMERON: Is it an excuse not to go?  
> PETER: You wish. (Laughs) No. With all these things coming out about Russo and the Brennan trial, she's under pressure to resign. Wait, it gets better. Word around the office is they're tapping someone in this car for acting D.A. Already started the vetting process.  
> CAMERON: Oh, my God, Peter, amazing.  
> PETER: Yeah.  
> CAMERON: Congratulations.[kisses Peter’s cheek](chuckles softly) Although that means any hope of this being a low-key, meet-the-colleagues type of event just evaporated. Tonight just became a way bigger deal.  
> PETER: People congratulating me, buying us drinks, getting wasted and asking inappropriate questions to the woman on the arm of the man of the hour.  
> CAMERON: Should we postpone? Do the big introductions literally any other night?  
> PETER: We could. But I was serious before. I mean, if you are.  
> CAMERON: Even if the headline tomorrow around the watercooler isn't "Cute A.D.A. becomes acting D.A." Now it's "Acting D.A. has transgender girlfriend"?  
> PETER: Yeah.  
> CAMERON: Okay. I'm in.

As she enters the party in Peter's arm, Cameron really wishes she'd had a a bit more warning about what she was getting into. It was daunting enough to have to meet her boyfriends co-workers in a normal party setting (especially since she's not very used to being openly someone's girlfriend), when your boyfriend is about to get a very public promotion, she needs to be even more impeccable. Be even more gracious in face of shitty comments. Not start lecturing them on how procecutors uphold the prison industrial complex and stuff like that. She needs to be perfect and poised and she is very, very happy they settled on a code word (Teacup pig) in case everything gets too awful.

But she suspects that Peter is worth all that. Would she be happier if he hadn't ghosted her, disappeared, called in sick and not talked to her about his fears? Yes. But the world is a toxic place, and it took her 26 years to get to fully be who she is, so she can forgive Peter his freak out. Because his apology really was something. He's willing to try, willing to possibly jeopardize his promotion by showing up with a trans woman to the event that is going to turn from a victim's benefit to being full of District Attorney Office politics and she will support him. At least for an hour. Maybe two if the food is good.

She manages to mostly keep a smile on her face the whole time, and it's not overall that bad. The open bar definitely helps. And she hopes she has endeared herself to Peter's friends by getting into a tequila shot challenge with Krista Reed. She had to defend her man's honor after all. 

Even though she thought a night out with a bunch of prosecutors wouldn't be fun, she did end up enjoying herself. In the morning, she's pretty sure she enjoyed the alcohol a bit too much. But Peter is still there with her in the morning, and even though he makes fun of her hangover, she could really get used to this.


End file.
